I remember it all so well, a new arrival and I had a book all about it. What amazed me by the book was that it told me like it was, it told me there would be challenges and told me help offered might not always fit your situation. It didn’t gloss over the troublesome bits and it wasn’t afraid to tell me that some aspects were going to be tricky. But at the end of it all I would be the proud owner of a fully functioning VW Camper van and I’d know all the tricks to look after it and keep it alive. I loved this book, it wasn’t the normal Haynes manual that just gave you clinical step-by-step instructions but no help at all when that perfect path didn’t match.
All the time while reading this, I was in the maturnity ward with my wife, we were expecting not only our first child but it was going to be twins. We didn’t have a clue about what was about to happen.
We had read all sorts of books during the pregnancy but none of them had really got us ready. The books were so clinical and “perfect” and worst of all they didn’t really say much about having twins. They seemed like a Haynes manual, for babies (which actually it turns out, is available, although more of a joke book I feel). If only there had been a book like the VW Camper one I was reading, a book that tells you like it is, doesn’t dress anything up, doesn’t suggest all will be ok all of the time but does let you know it is all worth it. Most of all, one that caters for the world of twins and how that changes everything. Changes not only the pregnancy and the birth, but everything ever after.
The book “Outnumbered from Day One” is just this, it is my VW Camper book but for life with twins. It’s not just about pregnancy, it’s not just about birth or even just about the first weeks, it is about life now that you have twins. Most of all, it’s so honest about everything, it doesn’t gloss over the challenges but at the same time it does tell you about the good parts, espically those that only come with twins (watching your twins first notice each other). It doesn’t scare you but it makes you aware that “you’re going to have your hands full” as any parent of twins will hear from well wishing strangers throughout the early days, over and over.
It does start with pregnancy, getting things ready not only material things but mentally too. Self help and mental wellbeing is discussed througout the book, not only for her but for him too. It has a whole section about your stay in hospital and makes you aware that it won’t be the same as if you were having just one baby. There are little snippets of real life stories from the author which brings it all home and shows you that books are one thing (even this one) but real life can be different. A chapter about toddlar tantrums tells you to keep your calm, the author then gives her real life experience, it’s so hard to keep your calm all the time she confesses, and rightly so. One of the quotes, “some days are brilliant, some days you can’t believe this is your life”, so so true, even more so when your friends with singletons just get on as if nothing has changed, or so it seems.
The book covers all the normal things such as sleeping (a challenge with two), weaning and eating (a challenge with two), but also twin related topics that only a parent of twins would know about. Logistics of going out, time for you and your partner on your own, comparing one twin against the other, labelling twins (“which one is the good one?” we were always asked). Comparing against your friend’s singleton babies or even worse comparing against Facebook and TikTok. Being aware that development in twins does not always follow the schedule. Being aware that premature birth, time spent in special care at the hospital, are all highly possible. Not scaring you, just keeping you informed and ready. “Don’t panic, but do log it” is advice given over and over.
When our twins were born I had a book that told you like it was, prepared you for a struggle and let you know it won’t always be plain sailing but actually the good days and rewards will outweigh the challenging days. Unfortunatly, it was for my VW Camper, if only it had been about living with and bringing up twins.
I look forward to a possible second book. Twins at school, twns during their teenage years and indeed even twins during the early stages of adulthood. You remain, outnumbered from day one…
You can by this book from Amazon.